|Some jobs require a daddy|
I have a confession to make: Lately I have resented my husband for "getting" to go to work and "only" work a 45 hour week. The other day I muttered something about how I wish I got a weekend after working 16 hours a day, 8 days a week. It's an easy trap to fall into, especially when every aspect of parenting seems so demanding and no break is imminent. It sometimes feels like even when you're "off" you're never truly off, with your mind whirling, thinking about this issue, planning that activity, mulling over a discipline question, etc.
Even when breaks are there, it can be hard to see through the fog. I got home from a weekend away and after two hours home, these words left my mouth: "I need a break." True story. Not proud of it.
So I started actually thinking through my day (without fake comparing where everything is lopsided to point to my doing all the work) and this is what I came up with.
On school days naptime lasts two hours, during which I can knit, read, clean the house, whatever (but if I do clean, it's usually my CHOICE).
I get to do some of my work in pajamas.
Sometimes my boss(es) are unreasonable and scream at me, but I don't have to have an annual review.
I don't get paid, but I don't worry about being fired for not doing something just right.
My job is predictable and always changing at the same time.
If I don't like one task, I can change to something else without huge looming deadlines.
I can eat lunch sort of when I want (and it goes straight from fridge to table without my having to pack anything).
My job largely involves the library.
So I decided to rethink my attitude. Because being resentful only fills me up with bitterness and ruins the free time I **do** have.
Plus, my vague memories of weekends as paradise don't really compare to reality. A lot of my husband's weekend was spent cleaning the garage and using various loud machines to destroy various unnecessary parts of our house. Mine was spent at the park, pushing kids on swings. I think I'll keep my job for now.